Looking Back
May 3rd, 2023
Today, on May 3rd, I'll be writing my last blog post while present in the McNair program and I think it's fitting to take inventory of what the past 5 semesters have been like. This experience began for me with my professor, Dr. Wanrudee Buranakorn. I was a T.A. in her course and she was ecstatic about my want to pursue a graduate degree; frankly, she was ecstatic about my pursuing anything. She would come into class everyday, providing a new opportunity or website I could check-out. To be entirely honest, it drained me. A lot of my life all I knew is I would achieve a graduate degree, but at the point of my Junior year, I was not so much concerned as to how that would happen.
I ended up caving and pursuing one of the opportunities, the McNair Scholars Program, after being looped into an email chain that Wanrudee had started between her and Dr. Kelly Wonder which was Wanrudee taking initiative on my admittance to the program without my knowledge. Best intentions, right?
I dove in head first, or as much as I could, into the program. I was enrolled virtually for the rest of the semester and immediately began to be involved in the planning for summer research, which the program offered as a paid opportunity for students to gain experience in undergraduate research. Faster than I could get a grip, I was learning about grant writing, running revisions with my professor, learning about IRB reviews and CITI certifications; suffice it to say, I wasn't going to be catching my breath in a moment.
As time moved on, I was able to start to get a hang of teaching myself, in conjunction with the materials the program provided, the art of how to find a suitable graduate program and get to know the department through email correspondence. My research had been approved and I felt on top of the world. I felt myself becoming an academic in a truer sense of the word, in contrast to someone who just really wanted to go to graduate school, I felt like I actually knew what I was doing.
After a summer of doubts and frantic work on research after my later IRB approval, although I was very drained, I felt so prepared. In addition to my self-directed research, I served as a student researcher on 2 other projects. I hit the ground running with the fall semester of my 4th year by displaying an installation format of one project and preparing an oral and poster presentation format for my McNair substantiated project. I presented at the McNair Scholars Symposium which gave me a value first experience with presenting research on a collegiate scale.
I also very recently presented those very same 3 projects at NCUR. I never thought I'd be able to achieve all of those things within a full year, but I did. I never thought I'd come to a point where I'd be able to help others in their graduate school preparation by product of what I've learned to look for in this program.
I wouldn't say this program changed me in any sort of existential way, but I'd certainly say it helped me see clearly what I'm capable of. In a sense, I've been testing my limits for the past 2 years now. Saying yes to almost every opportunity; taking a 17-20 credit load for almost every semester for those two years, and on top of all that, working 3 different jobs (one of them being managing my own business). I can, with full confidence, say that I'm a fantastic academic and scholar. Of course, the road hasn't been without some very trying times, unfortunately some later work, and many many hours of constant work, but I wouldn't trade it for anything.
The McNair Scholars Program, if you endeavor to get the most out of it that you can, is not for the faint of heart. Especially, if you have a full plate prior to enrolling in it. But if you can handle it, it allows for the best preparation I believe you can do for graduate programs.
It even offered the substantiation to make it a priority through funding opportunities. I think that it's doing something important in the world we live in. Ronald E. McNair was a pioneer in his own right, one, quite literally pioneering in space, but further, being a black man doing so. Being a black man and setting up this foundation, to pay
forward everything he worked for, for generations to come.
Coming from where I have, and being a BIPOC individual, the road isn't paved and much less traveled for those of us who may want more for ourselves. To not be limited by standards in society due to our class or race. But, I can say with full confidence that the McNair Program is vital to closing that gap.
